My friend Sonja Piper Dosti is a former Senior VP within the Hollywood community. Today she is a pastor’s wife and mother. I asked her if she would share her insider perspective on the hit movie The Blind Side. Sonja’s husband pastors Sun River Community Church in Fresno, CA.

Having worked in the film and TV industry as an exec and producer, it wasn’t easy being a Christian. Christians are a minority in the entertainment industry and most stay “in the closet,” fearing discrimination due to a post-modern, unbiblical worldview that permeates the business. Because of a lack of understanding of true biblical Christianity, Hollywood perceives that Christians are blind, racist, sexist, intolerant, gay bashing simpletons, not to mention hypocritical. As a result, it often portrays evangelical characters as such in numerous films and television series. Conversely, Hollywood will also create a character who claims to be a Christian and appears to be a “good person”, but in fact does not embody biblical principles.

Case in point: The Blind Side. Most major studios shy away from “feel-good” dramas as they’re not high-concept enough (think action-packed, 3-D, & based on a comic book) to attract a huge audience, especially males. For years, Hollywood ignored its female audience until movies like Titanic, Twilight, and Mamma Mia revealed the power of the purse. The Blind Side enjoyed huge commercial and critical success due to its top-notch performances, an uplifting and inspiring message, and the fact that it was based on a true story. Not only did it attract a female audience, but the backdrop of football made it palatable for husbands and boyfriends who reluctantly tagged along.

For all we know, the real-life Tuohys may have a wonderful marriage based on biblical principles. However, a biblical marriage is not as interesting to explore because it seems old-fashioned, backwards, and sexist, making the film a tougher sell than it already is. As noted in Rick’s review of the film, Leigh Anne Tuohy’s character is a domineering and strong-willed woman, surrounded by a bunch of passive, inept males (her younger son being the only exception to this rule). Since this film was created as a vehicle for a major actress, the writer/director and/or studio may have taken fictional liberties in order to make the part more attractive for a bigger-name star. Stars like Julia Roberts (the director had purportedly written the part with her in mind) and Sandra Bullock would most likely have passed on the role if Leigh Anne had been a helper to her husband with a quiet and gentle spirit, rather than how she’s portrayed in the film. After all, being a complementarian doesn’t win Academy Awards; being sassy and ruling over others does.

Sadly, The Blind Side is only one of many films and TV series that depict unbiblical marriages, which is a product of the curse (Gen 3). How many times do we see the shrill, contentious, and overbearing wife married to the emasculated husband who seems obsessed with sex and sports? Why? The Bible states in Genesis 3:16, “Your desire shall be for your husband and he shall rule over you.” I personally, hold to the interpretation, held by many commentators, where the desire of the woman is to rule or control her husband. This curse of the fallen woman is simply being portrayed on the big screen as the wish fulfillment of powerful women and the reality lived out in the lives of many male screenwriters.

Biblical Manhood & Womanhood: Our View

The biblical view of marriage is that a wife is to be a helper to her husband (Gen 3:18). Her priorities are to love God, submit to and respect her husband (Eph 5:22, 33), and care for her children and household (Pro 31; Titus 2:4-5). As sinners, it is impossible for women to abide by these commandments. It is more natural and common for a woman to want to dominate and disrespect her husband, and to seek her own good over placing the needs of her family first. However, all things are possible with Christ (Phil 4:13). No one deserves an Oscar more than an actress who can portray a truly biblical wife—to play such a role is a stretch for anyone and a performance of a lifetime.

The Gospel: The Point for All of Life

It’s ironic that Hollywood seems to denigrate and misrepresent biblical Christianity since many of its greatest hits benefit from biblical stories. Christ figures, sacrificial atonement, and redemption abound, as we’ve seen in the finale of television’s Lost, the critically acclaimed The Dark Knight, and even in the still popular Star Wars series. Hollywood doesn’t seem to learn from these successful films, nor from overtly Christian-themed films such as The Passion of the Christ or Fireproof. Everyone craves a story with redemption because we’re all lost and we know it (Rom 1). The greatest story of all time is the redemption and salvation of sinful, broken people who deserve the worst punishment. The writer and creator of that story is none other than Jesus Christ Himself. He deserves the greatest acclaim and honor that no critic or award can ever bestow.

For further reading about biblical manhood and womanhood, please go to The Council on Biblical Manhood & Womanhood site.

Other Related Articles

• The Sad Side to The Blind Side
• Comments From My Readers On The Blind Side
• Hollywood’s Blind Side: an insider’s look at the hit movie The Blind Side

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This note is from my friends Drew & Kamarie Miles, who will be adopting a third child, Nikolai, in early summer.

God has led us to adopt a little boy named Nikolai. Nikolai lives in an orphanage in the Ukraine. He has Down Syndrome, and like most children with Down Syndrome in Eastern Europe, he would spend most of his life in a mental institution, unless a family rescued him.

Drew and I learned of Nikolai through an adoption ministry called Reece’s Rainbow, who help children all over the world with Down Syndrome find their forever family. We both knew instantly that he was our son. Though it is difficult to explain, we had this feeling in our hearts that one of our sons was “missing.”

We immediately contacted Reece’s Rainbow and committed to do WHATEVER it takes to bring Nikolai home. The day after we sent our commitment papers, we received this email from the director of Reece’s Rainbow.

I just wanted to let you know….you just saved Nikolai from the institution. They were days from transferring him. Our facilitator called and they said they will hold him.

Nikolai was to be transferred to a mental institute had we not stepped out in faith and done what we knew God wanted us to do. We can’t begin to describe all the ways we have seen God’s hand at work. Nikolai is being held at the orphanage for our family, but we were told we need to move quickly. Within two weeks we completed all of our home study paperwork, were fingerprinted, had background checks done, medical exams, passports, etc….

We could be bringing Nikolai home in June! Reece’s Rainbow told us to expect our total adoption costs to be about $25,000. That seems like a lot and, as you might imagine, we have had a few brief moments of “panic” thinking about coming up with that kind of money in 3 to 4 months time. Drew and I have been able to put together about $7,000 and we have some friends helping us with some fundraisers for Nikolai.

We know that God is going to provide the other $18,000 we need by June. As a friend reminded me yesterday, that’s just 450 people giving $40. Please pray for our family as we go through this process. At times it feels like we are on an emotional rollercoaster.

1. Pray for Nikolai to be kept safe until we are united with him.
2. Pray that we would continue to be sensitive to God’s leading, even in the small things.
3. Pray for the financial needs to be met to bring Nikolai home.

Grace and Peace,
Drew, Kamarie, Lane, Hudson & Nikolai Miles!

If you would like to sponsor Nikolai’s adoption you can make a tax deductible donation click Reece’s Rainbow: International Down Syndrome Orphan Ministry.

Please click the Facebook link to share this article with all your Facebook friends. Ask the world of Facebook to pray for Nikolai!

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This testimony is from my friend Rose (real name), who attended a small group I led a few years ago. She asked me, at one point during our small group, what I thought about her cigarette smoking. I told her that it was not what was between her fingers that was the problem, but what was in her heart. At that moment God graciously did something in her heart. Over the next few months God changed Rose.

This is her story in her own words…

I did NOT want to quit smoking, I REALLY liked to smoke and felt that my smoking wouldn’t change my lifespan since God already knows the day we will be born and the day we will die. I did not think he was up there deducting time off my life for each cigarette I smoked. I DID believe that my quality of life could be improved if I quit smoking, but that wasn’t the selling point for me.

What made me ask Rick about quitting was that he kept saying that the gospel was the answer to everything and I just couldn’t figure out how Jesus dying for my sins and defeating death was an answer to someone trying to give up an addiction/idol.

Therefore, I asked him to explain this to me and he did. I do not have his exact words or sketches that he drew for me, but I will tell you the things that struck a chord with me and those things that I have realized since I decided to TRUST Christ with one of the little things in my life. Also, the most important thing for me to remember is that I didn’t quit smoking, I just decided to live in faith and God did the rest.

Let me start with the gospel:

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that who so ever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” If I truly believe that, then I should have a response to that daily and that would be my faith expressing itself in my life. Then I have to think of my faith and what that looks like in my life. I go to church, read the Bible, pray, attend care group, fellowship with believers, and on and on and on…

This is all me doing things and living in my little Christian box, but where am I growing? I am growing in knowledge and truth, but where are the evidences of my faith being manifested in my life? I would have to say that if we REALLY are to grow in faith, we need to step out of our boxes, that is where we see the evidence of faith, grace, mercy, and the Holy Spirit dwelling in us and being manifested in our lives.

Remember that God always goes before us and sometimes he takes us places outside our daily boxes, because He loves us. This may be the loss of a job, the loss of a loved one, moving to a new state, a troubled teen, facing the fact that we have an idol, etc… As far as idols go, it may be that doctor telling you that your sugar is high, the feeling of being run down all the time, a cough that won’t go away, or just the fact that you have to spend money on new clothes, but your old clothes are perfectly fine, they just don’t fit anymore.

This is the place that puts feet on our stagnant faith (the routine/the box) as God places us outside our neat little boxes and asks us? “Am I still God when you are out here? Do I still love you when you’re out here? Do you still trust in me and the gospel when you’re out here?” At this point we have to preach the gospel to ourselves and trust in him again, even though it isn’t in our control, and keep walking towards the cross and following him as he goes before us. Each time He takes us outside our box and we trust in Him fully, our box gets bigger (our faith increases) and our praises should grow and our testimony for Him will grow. All the glory belongs to Him!!!

Now, realizing that I had been growing in knowledge and truth for many years by receiving the gospel made me realize that God was equipping me for this growing/stepping out of the box and I was immediately amazed by His kindness. At that point, I had not even decided to give it to Christ, but I had to examine my motives for giving it to Him. I would have to REALLY physically, emotionally, and spiritually trust Him daily and walk VERY closely with Him. I would have to put all my weight on Him. Our trust in Him has to be exactly that, our trust in HIM!

Crying Like an Infant and Talking with God

For me, especially the giving it over to Him was the hardest part as I sat on my knees, face on the ground in my bathroom for over two hours crying like an infant and talking with God. My conversation was kind of like this:

I know that you are who you say you are and because of that, I know I can trust you. I know you will take this from me and I won’t have to worry about it, but I have to be the one to give it to you and this is the part that I am struggling with the most. I have to choose between trusting in you or trusting in my idol. To trust in you means I must relinquish my idol to you today by trusting in you and then, I have to choose to trust in you daily to sustain me

As you can see, as I was having this conversation with God, it became apparent that by giving God this idol, I was “through Him” living out the gospel. Therefore, the gospel is the answer to everything. POINT MADE!!!!

Lastly, once I put the burden of my idol on Him (all the weight on him) my burden of trusting Him daily was light. BAM!! There you go, the gospel once again!!

Since that first day, I have realized that Christ freed me from a false god. What was I thinking??? I would get stressed, bored, anxious, etc. and go bow to my idol (smoke a cigarette) and then feel okay as if something was accomplished. No, the only true life sustaining accomplishment is what was accomplished for me on the cross!

I hope this helps you! I will pray for His accomplishment through you!!

Thank you for asking me about this, it has helped me to take another look at my box and ask myself if my box is growing or stagnant?

Read My Other Cigarette Stories

1. Cigarettes & Jesus
2. You Can Smoke Everywhere

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I asked Emily Hope Baker if I could post the following. She graciously agreed. Thanks Emily!

Mark & Emily’s counseling website is called Hope for Life Biblical Counseling and Equipping The following is from Emily…

This was written by a friend of mine in regard to a key issue in the upcoming presidential election here in the States. Though not “easy” to read, I believe it’s something we all need to hear and take to heart. Thank you for sharing this, Rebekah.

Getz Creative Photography

By James Naisang

Have you ever wondered if your child is truly saved? I often have, and like all Christian parents, I desire for my children to come to a genuine, saving faith in Jesus Christ, passionately grasp the Gospel, apply its life transforming truths and bear fruit that lasts.

My heart resonates with the Apostle John when he states, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth” (3 John 4). I am eager to hear them declare their undivided love for the Savior, and yet I have often struggled with knowing how to truthfully evaluate my child’s profession of faith. How can I know if my child has come to a saving knowledge in the Lord and is not walking in deception?

Recently after reading Your Child’s Profession of Faith, by Dennis Gundersen, I received valuable insight on this matter. In a nutshell, Gundersen establishes that although some children are saved at an early age, it is generally difficult to discern true salvation in young children. It is usually during their teen years that a child’s faith (or lack thereof) begins to be revealed. Distinguishing between a child’s profession of faith is much like trying to distinguish the sex of your child at conception. It’s nearly impossible to know if the fetus is a boy or a girl until it has grown to a certain level of maturity. And then there is no mistaking the child’s sex. In the same way, a child who professes to be saved may or may not be and therefore, it is beneficial to wait until it is clear that he or she has genuine, saving faith.

Evaluating our children’s spiritual state is much like the process we use to evaluate their individual gifts and talents. For example, when my oldest son Joshua was about six years of age he expressed a desire to play the guitar. Upon his profession, I was eager for him to begin playing, but was also apprehensive being aware of the fleeting desires of children. Instead of going to Musicians Friend and ordering him a $6,000 Martin guitar, I visited our local Super K Mart, and purchased a ¾ sized acoustic guitar that cost me about thirty five bucks. After teaching Joshua three basic chords, I watched to see what he would do. Over time, he mastered the chords so I taught him three more. Although he was showing growth, it was still too early to know if my son would really be able to play the guitar. Because of his age, there were many variables I was unsure of. Will he be able to keep time and play rhythms? Does he have an ear for music? Will he grow tired and bored and move onto something else? Only after a season of growth and evaluation could I know.

For me, understanding this concept has been a tremendous encouragement! Instead of feeling the pressure to have my children make a profession of faith, I can daily instruct them to seek a living relationship with Jesus. Rather than trying to lead them in a prayer, I will continue to encourage them to come to Jesus, love God’s Word and instruct them in the Gospel. True salvation will produce a true profession of faith and it will become evident to all as he or she begins bearing fruit that accompanies their salvation.

In closing, I want to emphasize that the point is not whether a child can be saved at an early age. Rather, we are encouraged to be wise parents in our assessment of our children’s salvation so as not to falsely give them eternal hope when in reality their lives do not display enough discernable fruit to do so. I believe this approach will only serve to strengthen the church of Jesus Christ for generations to come!

Oh, and by the way . . . recently Joshua turned 13 and it is evident that he has the desire, ability and skill to grow in playing the guitar. Therefore I invested in a better instrument for him to play. And just in case you’re wondering, it wasn’t the $6000 guitar from Musicians Friend. As a matter of fact, I’m certain that he’ll never mature enough for me to buy him a guitar like that as long as he’s living under my roof!

Other Helpful articles to help you think through what it means to be a Christian

1. Your Child’s Profession of Faith, by Dennis Gundersen
2. How Can I Know My Kid is Saved, by James Naisang
   
3. I Prayed: Therefore I Am … a Christian

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