This case study comes from my friend Julie Ganschow. She wants to know how you would counsel John. You can email Julie here with your thoughts.
John comes to you for counseling. He is a member of your church and married Susie only recently. Susie and her family have been members of your church all their lives. Susie went to Christian school, college, and is now a grade school teacher in your church school.
Their relationship was the talk of the church, and every one was thrilled when Susie and John announced they were getting married after dating for over 2 years.
John reveals to you that while Susie was a virgin when they married, he was not. In high school, college and up until he got saved about 3 years ago he was very immoral. He had been in many sexual situations and freely indulged his flesh in every way. Upon coming to Christ he gave up every form of sexual immorality, and he had taken the leadership role in establishing clear guidelines of conduct for their relationship prior to marriage. He was honest with Susie about his past. Prior to their marriage he shared with her his pre-salvation lifestyle.
He loves Susie deeply and completely and the reason he has come to you is because when they are in bed together, he is having images of other girls in his mind. He tells you he is seeing their faces, and the things they did together and he is bothered about this. He has not told her this and wants your help in making it go away.
Here are your questions. How would you respond?
- Does John have an obligation to talk to Susie about what is going on?
- What do you imagine would be Susie’s reaction if John discusses this with her?
- How would you counsel John to proceed?
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