We believe that the counselee should give written permission to share their counseling data and to designate the nature and type of information to be shared (e.g. verbal, written, summary only) and who to share it with. We also feel it would be best to have the counselee himself discuss with their pastor the content and progress in counseling on a regular basis, if the pastor requests it.

When it comes to communication with a counselee’s pastor we believe it should be left to the director of the counseling center or another designated person with permission from the counselee.

Therefore, in answer to questions 1 & 2, based on the level of the counselee’s involvement in their local church, we would contact the pastor upon request from and with permission from the counselee. If the counselee is not active in church then a foundational part of their counseling homework is to get back involved in church attendance and ministry. Otherwise, we would encourage the counselee to let their pastor know they are in counseling and to inform them of their progress.

In response to questions 3 & 4 we think it would be beneficial to develop a brochure explaining the biblical counseling services we provide and to make the information available to area local churches. As believers we are called to come along side those overtaken in a fault and to help restore them (Gal. 6:1-2). We see our biblical counseling service as a ministry to fellow believers and a mission to the lost. As counselees begin to grow and change and share their progress in their faith, we hope that churches that do not practice biblical counseling will see the need to be better equipped to help their own members work through their problems.

Question 5: We would encourage Bill & Mary to prayerfully talk with their pastor about their concerns. We would encourage them to prayerfully seek a fellowship where the Word is taught and they can continue to grow and serve, if that seems to be the only solution.

When a person comes to counseling outside their local church, many times that signifies a “problem” of some sort with the local church.

The counselor needs to discern, in detail, why they are coming to you. There is so much more to this than what can be addressed here in this comment.

But the bottom line in some cases is that it might not be wise for the counselees to continue at that local church. However, that can be a huge decision and needs to be worked through on so many different levels.

I have recommended in some rare cases a person seek out another church because they were people in need of soul care and it was objectively obvious that their current church could not care for them and they understood that I am not a “life coach” that they would come to until we all go to heaven.

“Until death do we part” is not my role for them, but the local church’s.

They grew in their understanding of what the local church is about, according to the NT and began to feel in their conscience that they needed to be in one that was trying to model a NT local church as far as soul care.

Again, there is so much more to say here.

The up-in-the-air part is this: Would it be right to insist they attend a different church as one of the requirements for counseling?